Wednesday, August 11, 2004
doctors report
well this is my first entry in about a week. the first few days, i have no excuse. the last two days i do. i had spent monday at the hospital getting canulated and put throughout the CT scan. a CT or cat scat is the big machine where you slide back and forth through the circle. i have to drink this contrast die before hand that makes me wretch. the one die i drink is better than the other option which makes me vomit. this on top of starving myself for 12 hours prior. as i get pushed through the machine being laser x-rayed, i am injected with a clear iodine solution. it makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside but not right. that was my monday morning. i was feeling sick the rest of the day.
monday after noon, i after coming home, i walked down to the shops and had blood drawn. this normally isn't such a big deal, but because i had been canulated in both arms in the morning, the first time they missed, by the time i had had blood drawn my arms were sore. it hurt to bend at the elbow, sore badly. so that was the later half of the day.
tuesday, i was back at the hospital (getting physically sick seeing the building) to see the oncologist, dr. bell. a great person. he has led the way in my treatment in cancer and as he told me yesterday, my recovery up to this point is outstanding. so all tests were clear! my blood markers are below detectable levels, which is the best indicator for testicular cancer. and the CT scan highlighted the scar tissue from my inflamed lymph node, but that is to be as expected. it is what it is. so now, instead of scans and tests like the day before being every 3 months, they will now be every 4 months. this is huge for me. it just puts a little distance between me and chemo. chemo is worse than cancer. cancer gets you sick, but the cure, chemo-therapy, that is what really fucks you up.
today, i was back there again, to see two post cancer counselors i have been visiting on a regular basis for the last 7 months. catching up, and bringing to a close some of my recovery process. once again, i felt sick looking at the hospital building. i have to turn my nose and whince, because of the sour taste that comes up in my mouth. however, i have returned home feeling slightly buzzed from a coffee and charged up for life, from the doctors report.
monday after noon, i after coming home, i walked down to the shops and had blood drawn. this normally isn't such a big deal, but because i had been canulated in both arms in the morning, the first time they missed, by the time i had had blood drawn my arms were sore. it hurt to bend at the elbow, sore badly. so that was the later half of the day.
tuesday, i was back at the hospital (getting physically sick seeing the building) to see the oncologist, dr. bell. a great person. he has led the way in my treatment in cancer and as he told me yesterday, my recovery up to this point is outstanding. so all tests were clear! my blood markers are below detectable levels, which is the best indicator for testicular cancer. and the CT scan highlighted the scar tissue from my inflamed lymph node, but that is to be as expected. it is what it is. so now, instead of scans and tests like the day before being every 3 months, they will now be every 4 months. this is huge for me. it just puts a little distance between me and chemo. chemo is worse than cancer. cancer gets you sick, but the cure, chemo-therapy, that is what really fucks you up.
today, i was back there again, to see two post cancer counselors i have been visiting on a regular basis for the last 7 months. catching up, and bringing to a close some of my recovery process. once again, i felt sick looking at the hospital building. i have to turn my nose and whince, because of the sour taste that comes up in my mouth. however, i have returned home feeling slightly buzzed from a coffee and charged up for life, from the doctors report.
