The Word B

i got back the photos of the operation today. i took in a disposable camera to the hospital, the kind with a flash. i was curious to know what they were going to do to me and how they were going to go about it. i had asked one of the surgeons ahead of time, if it was o.k. he agreed. so i gave the camera to one of the crew and asked for a few photos. they took about 10. holy fuck! it is some nasty gruesome shit. i will have to learn to scan them into the computer and then upload then on the blog site. but i am afraid if i do that i may be arrested for snuff film. what they did to me is straight out of the pages of mary shelley. it is dr. frankenstien shit. and the tumor they cut out! my god, it is huge. but better out than in.
my justification for the photos now is this- i got this huge scar on my body. i freak out everytime i look at my belly, and at least this gives me an explanation as to why and how i have it.
today is two weeks post surgery. i am moving around town, slowly. but still moving. tomorrow will be better than today. at least i know i am healing.